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We all have our holiday issues. I have not felt the need to discuss my "joy" this season, but mine is not that far from Brick. My father is disabled and has always had the fiscal responsibility of a drunk sailor on shore leave. 3-4 years after he became disabled, I built my parents a house that was largely handicapped accessible. I charge them "rent" in the amount of the taxes and maintenance (mortgage is all me) and have not raised it in at least a decade. It's a three bedroom house.I am Jewish (as is my father), but my mother and sister are Christian (long story). So my two kids are Jewish, but my sister's daughter is Christian. My sister's first husband died in 2010, but she has gotten remarried (to a great guy). Every year we go see my parents (to the house I own) to help my mother celebrate. My sister, her husband and daughter come. My sister always brings her well trained smallish poodle mix. This year she also added a rottweiler that is completely unruly, which I had previously said I did not want in the house. Before kids, we would go and each stay in a bedroom. Now, with kids, that isn't possible because they would have to sleep in the parents rooms or on the floor in the living room. The kids could stay in the living room, except my sister brings her dogs and there is the whole Santa thing. So, instead of staying in the house, my wife and kids are expected to get a hotel room and my sister stays at home. OK. So I am spending a couple thousand a month on a house for my parents to live in and I get to stay in a nearby hotel. My niece gets what can only be described as 1/2 of the latest toys r us flier for Christmas from "Santa". I tried to have a conversation about how Santa would be dealt with by my sister to which I was yelled at for being self-centered. So this year, we get to my parents. We have a nice lunch and my sister shows up. She has brought the new dog despite my prior statements. Well, then my 4 year-old loses it and wants to crawl back inside my wife because he is terrified of the dog. We then go into my parents room to let my son hide for a bit. In there, I discover materials that are going to be used by my parents' contractor to renovate a portion of the house. Umh, it's my house. How can they do that without asking me? I resign myself to not getting too angry and to just go along with it. It's about this time that I see that within the first 2 hours, the rotti has already scratched the back door to pieces. I cook dinner for everyone and leave to go to the hotel. For whatever reason, the hotel and the area around it smells like sewage. Constantly. We go back to my parents on Christmas day, after "Santa" has arrived and his gifts have been open. In other words, there are 40-50 my little ponies strewn across the floor. My kids got nothing from Santa. We have explained this because we aren't Christian, we don't get gifts from Santa. My niece says it is because my kids are bad... My sister says nothing. I have to tell my niece it is because we are not Christian and explain to her and my now angry/upset/crying kids that it is not anything to do with bad or good. My niece distills all of this to mean that we are bad and Santa didn't give us anything because we are bad. No intervention from the sister. I tell her that that isn't why, if we were bad we would have gotten coal and just move on. What I wanted to tell her was that Santa is made up and that your mom has been lying to you... My sister then declares that she has a headache and goes to lay on the couch. I bring my kids out back to play. The older boy slips in a pile of dog poop that my sister has not picked up. She later asserts that it wasn't her dogs, it must have been a stray. Her dog's poop different color.... I should have taken DNA. So then I set up everyone's dinner and then go back to the hotel. The next day, we go to the house and she is gone, but the dogs are there. She went out shopping. A little reprieve, except my kids are still deathly afraid of the dog and want to go home or to the hotel every minute there. More stuff happened, but it isn't worth recounting. At least my stereo was no where in site.
Man, I used to feel sorry for myself living in another state by myself without and family members ever coming to visit me for the holidays or any other time for that matter. After reading these stories, I actually feel pretty good about it now. Thanks everyone for the unsolicited help.. LOL
I was wondering how the Warden feels about all of this...I say we all donate and send a bottle of good Scotch or Bourbon to ease the pain a bit.
He will refer to you as a Luddite from now on.
"Maybe that's why, when they left yesterday this morning, they cleaned out a bunch of crap from their car and piled it up against our patio door."Pictures! Pictures!Perhaps this pile is actually their Christmas gift to you?
TB, I hope you can have a long and serious talk with your wife to find real solutions. These relationships affect her happiness. In the meantime, your SSIL, and possibly your DIL, are labeling you as the "old asshole" in front of your wife's grandkids. Tread slowly and deliberately.
