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Thank you all for the possibilities. I spoke with the wife, and we'll go look at some minivans. To me, the minivan is the perfect vehicle for our needs, as we don't need to tow anything, and they tend to get better gas mileage. Our process will take a while, but I'll post back as to what we look at, what we (she) thinks, and what we (she) gets.
After looking at minivans and SUVs, my wife likes either the new Honda Pilot or the Buick Enclave/GMC Acadia/Chevy Traverse. She says we don't need the space of a minivan (true, as 90% of the time, it will be my wife and two kids), but we would like the ability to haul 5 adults and two kids and two dogs. The Enclave/Acadia/Traverse allow that to happen, while most other (medium size) SUVs do not (the old Honda Pilot and Toyota Highlander both have third rows that are quite small). So, the chances are high we'll be getting either an Enclave or an Acadia, probably the latter, and a used one with low miles if we can swing that. I personally can't believe how expensive these cars are -- it's easy to get close to 50k.
Unfortunately, the wife refuses to look at minivans and does not like the Ford Flex.
Thank you the comments. The Acadia and Traverse are slightly less expensive. They all easily surpass 40k, though. The Sequoia I think is nice, but too huge. My wife refuses to even drive one. It's also more than we want to pay -- starting at 50k for the "cheap" model. We want to put 10-15k down and pay about $550/month for five years. We would then have no payments for 3-5 years. My calculations yield 42,500 as the maximum price (and taxes would take that to 45,000). The Acadia/Traverse are really the right size: not huge but not too small. It is too bad that they're under powered yet also get poor gas mileage. The Acadia is redesigned this year, but the new models haven't reached the dealers yet.