With all these fancy media formats and hi tech receivers in every household, you'd think they could come up with a way to making the dialogue and the sound effects on seperate layers or tracks to be turned up or down independently. There could just be a reference point for the purests.
I would happily leave purism behind for "I get the point" level of sound effects with clear dialogue.
Josh, I am with you! The biggest contributing factor to a bad experience I have with movies, in a theater, is the sound. I just came back from SherlockHolmes(It wasn't that bad since the action scenes were not constant). But overall, either it's a really poor sound system(pure garbage) or if it's decent, it's way too loud.
At home, my Denon AV receiver allows level setting for the individual 5 or 7 channels. Therefore, since the main dialog is nearly all in the center channel, it's very simple to turn up just the center (relative to the others ) or turn down the levels in the others. Running a straight 2 speaker setup may not allow this, depending on your amp/receiver/processor. At home, I never get knocked out of seat by surprise, for which I am very happy--that's why my movie theater visits are not common for me...only do it socially. And I view very few Action movies anyway. But I still have seen/heard the blatant offenders.