Michael Green--Magic Wood

Tonto Yoder · « **on:** 25 Mar 2005, 12:36 pm »

Not an ad for the products, but thought members might find the claims interesting--

http://cls.audiogon.com/cgi-bin/cls.pl?accstwek&1116684391

woodsyi · « **Reply #1 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 01:48 pm »

I get a feeling that MG's Tuneland is like the Church of Scientology. He makes dubious claims using quasi-techno mumbo jumbo and have more product to sell than your "favorite" Amway relative. I wouldn't be too surprised if he really is a member of the Church of Scientology.

P.S. I actually did enjoy reading Battlefield Earth. It is a hoot. Didn't bother with the movie.

rosconey · « **Reply #2 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 01:49 pm »

magic wood-sounds like the next sex pill for older men

Tonto Yoder · « **Reply #3 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 02:16 pm »

Quote from: woodsyi

I get a feeling that MG's Tuneland is like the Church of Scientology. He makes dubious claims using quasi-techno mumbo jumbo .....

And the problem is that the actual products may well be beneficial tweaks but that the hyperbolic claims can make people suspicious of their merits.

Tonto Yoder · « **Reply #4 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 02:16 pm »

John Ashman · « **Reply #5 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 02:25 pm »

Oh.....my......GAWD.

I notice that these can cure boomy bass AND lack of bass, rolled off highs AND "brittle" highs. Quite a feat. I think I'm going to come out with divining rods for speaker placement. $50 per stick (sold in pairs). Plus $19.95 shipping and handling.

meby · « **Reply #6 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 05:23 pm »

Everytime I bring home a new tweak and tell my wife much I paid for it she starts laughing, then she say i am going to take a shit and freeze it and sell it to your friends and tell them it will make their system sound better.

hmen · « **Reply #7 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 08:27 pm »

He forgot to say that it makes CD's sound like vinyl.

You can go to a craft store, buy a small bag of wood blocks, a tube of Elmer's glue and save $75. This also gives you the chance to customize them to fit snugly around the wires of your choice. This will give you more liquid midrange and make a $179 receiver from Sears sound like tubes.
Actually, I've read in a couple of places that lifting wires off the carpet helps because carpets contain a lot of static electricity (would anyone like to buy some static-free audiophile carpet?). Mapleshade also sells a similar product.
There might be some validity to their claims, although I find the idea that changing the spacing of the little wood things changes the tone of the music a little far out. This would be a good DIY project for a 5 year old on a rainy day.

Gordy · « **Reply #8 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 10:22 pm »

Ya'll just don't appreciate the magical properties of Tibetian yak urine soaked wood...

Not to defend MG, but I've seen cable lifters sell for more per piece than he's asking for a set of 8! If you're incapable of makng your own, it's not that bad of a price. Empty wine (or your fav) bottles and a glass cutter? Polish up the edges with a torch...

nathanm · « **Reply #9 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 10:34 pm »

Those things are really just a stopgap measure. The ideal solution is to replace your existing flooring with a metal grids and install a large fan beneath which blows your cables upwards at all times. The chaotic motion of the flapping cables can be steadied with Cable Wings ™ attached every foot for maximum aeordynamics and timbre preservation.

But in a pinch the elevators really do work. If the song sounds too brittle in the high treble simply drape the cables over soft balsa elevators. If it's an old worn record use coke bottles for a glassier tone. If the vocalist was recorded with a "hot" mic simply drape the cables over elevators which are painted blue, because blue is a "cool" color.

Gordy · « **Reply #10 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 10:42 pm »

I tried the fans, it was a disaster for me. The dogs all stretched their heads to the right and drooled on everything...

John Ashman · « **Reply #11 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 11:00 pm »

Sorry, until anti-gravity is invented, the sound of our cables is going to be all screwed up.

Huh. Speaking of which, wouldn't it just make sense to just save the money and buy wires that are a foot or two too short so they hang there?

John Ashman · « **Reply #12 on:** 25 Mar 2005, 11:01 pm »

And I'm definitely not selling *my* magic wood for no $75!!!!!!

suits_me · « **Reply #13 on:** 26 Mar 2005, 03:21 am »

>i am going to take a shit and freeze it and sell it to your friends and tell them it will make their system sound better.

What do you think BlackHole cabinet damping is, anyway? Except cryo'd, not just put in the freezer.

I've never attempted to test cable lifters (I currently have no carpet on the floor behind the speakers,) but the theory is not that the carpet has static electricity. It's all about dialectric effects. That's an actual effect in physics and in cable sheathing, but whether its presence or lack repeatably makes a diff, and in what exact situations, I don't know....

ToddSTS · « **Reply #14 on:** 26 Mar 2005, 03:38 pm »

Quote from: John Ashman

Sorry, until anti-gravity is invented, the sound of our cables is going to be all screwed up.

Huh. Speaking of which, wouldn't it just make sense to just save the money and buy wires that are a foot or two too short so they hang there?

Any anti-gravity solution would alter the flow of gravitons through the cables and affect the weight of the music.

However, I will soon be offering a Magic-Uranium® product which solve all your sound quality issues, adding speed, PRAT, airiness, openness, resolution and warmth to any source.

I will take orders and determine final pricing once I finalize with my enriched-uranium suppliers in North Korea and Iran.

Note: Not responsible for any health problems or legal entanglements with the Federal Govenrment for use of said product.

Todd

John Ashman · « **Reply #15 on:** 26 Mar 2005, 03:49 pm »

Quote from: ToddSTS

Any anti-gravity solution would alter the flow of gravitons through the cables and affect the weight of the music.

Luddite!!!!

JoshK · « **Reply #16 on:** 26 Mar 2005, 04:01 pm »

Is it me or does MG look like a TV Evangelist?

lonewolfny42 · « **Reply #17 on:** 26 Mar 2005, 04:01 pm »

I think its best to eliminate the cables all together, and search for the true sound.......

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hmen · « **Reply #18 on:** 26 Mar 2005, 04:14 pm »

Quote from: JoshK

Is it me or does MG look like a TV Evangelist?

He looks like something from TV. Maybe he also sells hair tweaks.

John Ashman · « **Reply #19 on:** 26 Mar 2005, 05:26 pm »

Quote from: JoshK

Is it me or does MG look like a TV Evangelist?

Or a cross between Yanni and Fabio.

"Buy my magic wood! Look at me, I am beautiful. My magic wood works! I am a handsome man, you must buy from me! I am gorgeous, look at my perfect hair! Magic wood works!"