[jschwenker]

There are some advantages to being this age.

People will often stand and offer you their seat.

It’s very nice on the bus. A little creepy in the men’s room, though.

[mix4fix]

How do we know that Santa is a man?

He shows up late, eats your cookie, empties his sack,  comes only once, calls you a "ho, and leaves while you are asleep.

[jschwenker]

“Enquiring" minds want to know:

What’s the cheese to whizz ratio in Cheese Whizz?

[jschwenker]

When she heard me sing, my music teacher said I should sing tenor.

Tenor twelve miles away from her.

[BobM]

A little girl comes home from school and tells her father "I heard a funny joke today daddy."

Dad: "Well, tell it to me."

Girl "What goes in stiff and comes out soft and mushy?"

Dad: [OMG, what can I say to this, Shit, Damn, Crap!]

Girl: [puzzled look as Dad chokes on an answer]

Mom: [Running in from the kitchen] "It's spaghetti, the answer is spaghetti!"

[Rx8man]

Why is a woman like a coal miner?

Because if they want diamonds, they have to work the shaft 

[mix4fix]

The coffee shop has a sign that says "No Wi-Fi, pretend it's 1973".

So, I paid 10 cent for my coffee, and lit a cigarette.