Joke of the Day

JerryM · « **Reply #1520 on:** 2 Oct 2015, 04:43 pm »

A kindergarten teacher is trying to explain to her class the definition of the word "definitely". To make sure the students have a good understanding of the word, she asks them to use it in a sentence.

The first student raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue". The teacher said, "Well, that isn't entirely correct, because sometimes it's grey and cloudy".

Another student says, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher again replies "If grass doesn't get enough water it turns brown, so that isn't really correct either."

Finally, Billy raises his hand and asks the teacher "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher looked at him and said "No...But that isn't really a question you want to ask in class discussion." So Billy replies, "Then I definitely just shit my pants."

mikeeastman · « **Reply #1521 on:** 2 Oct 2015, 05:43 pm »

Bob in St. Louis · « **Reply #1522 on:** 2 Oct 2015, 11:48 pm »

Turn up your speakers.
https://www.facebook.com/tyrese/videos/1428015677226024/

dflee · « **Reply #1523 on:** 3 Oct 2015, 12:54 am »

Thanks Bob. That voice cleaned my ears out. Al-tho now I have this terrible
ringing in my ears and that voice on a moebius in my head.

Guy 13 · « **Reply #1524 on:** 3 Oct 2015, 01:02 am »

Hi,
wow, that women is something...
She had a bottle of peper spray, why she did not use it,
instead of screaming the same thing a hunded times...

FullRangeMan · « **Reply #1525 on:** 3 Oct 2015, 01:47 am »

Women do not like kill, they like torture us.

dex67 · « **Reply #1526 on:** 4 Oct 2015, 12:46 am »

ahhh, i was hoping....no such luck! lol.....hopefully folks will continue to make THIS forum funny!

thunderbrick · « **Reply #1527 on:** 4 Oct 2015, 04:06 am »

Yep. There goes the neighborhood.....

Russell Dawkins · « **Reply #1528 on:** 4 Oct 2015, 04:37 am »

mm-hmm

dex67 · « **Reply #1529 on:** 4 Oct 2015, 10:42 am »

glad that i'm not the only one feeling this way...wait, maybe i do need someone to explain this to me...

Letitroll98 · « **Reply #1530 on:** 4 Oct 2015, 12:11 pm »

Quote from: dex67 on 4 Oct 2015, 10:42 am

glad that i'm not the only one feeling this way...wait, maybe i do need someone to explain this to me...

http://www.audiocircle.com/index.php?topic=137688.msg1465040;topicseen#new

I for one like the diverse culture and personages we have at AC. You guys seem like a bunch of cliquey high school girls, "oh, we won't let that person into our group". If you can't accept people the way they are, maybe you need a different forum.

dex67 · « **Reply #1531 on:** 4 Oct 2015, 04:28 pm »

yeap, that's exactly how we are...

...your post made me smile...i guess it was both humorous and a joke...

Letitroll98 · « **Reply #1532 on:** 5 Oct 2015, 04:13 am »

Deleted

dex67 · « **Reply #1533 on:** 5 Oct 2015, 03:52 pm »

let's get back to funny posts...

...thank god you're a man...

JakeJ · « **Reply #1534 on:** 6 Oct 2015, 01:45 am »

Yes, the "Flow Chart of Life", know it well.

Along the same vein

jhm731 · « **Reply #1535 on:** 6 Oct 2015, 09:12 pm »

mikeeastman · « **Reply #1536 on:** 6 Oct 2015, 10:29 pm »

A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the train, cause we're going down the tracks." The mother went nuts and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking from the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today." As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the two hour delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen."

Bob in St. Louis · « **Reply #1537 on:** 8 Oct 2015, 05:38 pm »

As I slipped my finger slowly inside her hole, I could immediately feel it getting wetter and wetter.
I took my finger back out and within seconds she was going down on me.
I thought to myself….
"I really need a new fucking boat,"

JerryM · « **Reply #1538 on:** 8 Oct 2015, 06:32 pm »

dex67 · « **Reply #1539 on:** 9 Oct 2015, 11:50 am »