[Mag]

Dancing with a women at an event.

Women: Is that all you can do is a circle?

Me: I can do a square if you wish.

[AllanS]

With my Navy Italian Adonis roommate hitting on a woman at a punk club in Key West in '82.
Roomie: Wanna dance?
Woman: NO!
Roomie: I guess f**k is out of the question.

But they ended up doing exactly that until her husband returned from deployment 

[I.Greyhound Fan]

If some one tells me to "kiss my A$$"  I reply, "pick a spot you are all A$$.

[Jeff_From_Michigan]

"Come again?"

........."I didn't come the first time."

[Photon46]

"I was hoping for a battle of wits, but you appear to be unarmed."

[I.Greyhound Fan]

If some one says to me "Go F yourself", I reply "You're the expert, show me how".

[Markwatkiss]

My wife ran away wth my best friend ad I sure do miss him.

[I.Greyhound Fan]

Are you coming or just happy to see me?

[Mag]

Being a Courier Driver I was sent to a warehouse for first time with a bunch of boxes. The Receiver tells me to place the boxes on a pallet in a 10-10 stack. Not knowing what a 10-10 stack was, I proceed to place the boxes. The Receiver walks over and kicks over my stack. After the third time I finally get it right and have him to sign my weigh-bill so that I can get paid.

Receiver: What are you starring at?

Me: I want to see what god looks like, because around here you're god!

Receiver: Don't come here again.