[Tyson]

How can I stop?

There's AA of course which is a huge program that has helped a lot of people.  It never clicked for me, I have problems with the whole God thing.  I ended up using Lifering which is more science focused.  Another good program I've heard people having success with is SMART recovery (more tools focused).

Oh, and the rec to see your doctor is good.  There's things like Naltrexone (lowers cravings), and Antabuse (makes you vomit if you drink).  Naltrexone is nice because it lowers that white-knuckle period during the first 6 months.  If you find you drink in spite of that (and in spite of a good support group), Antabuse can be used as a much stronger deterrent (ie, you vomit almost immediately). 

Modern science is cool in that it gives you more tools to deal with the challenges of getting sober.

[ohenry]

Yep, see the doc.  If you are the least bit physically dependent, cold turkey is dangerous.  Best of luck to you and all that have struggled.

[murphy11]

Good luck to anyone who wants or needs to stop drinking or using drugs. Stopping is usually not that difficult, it's the staying stopped that is the challenge. I put down the drink many times only to pick it up again every time after things got better.

A 12 step program has worked for me for almost 8 years and believing in god is not required although some groups are more god focused than others. Good news is there are usually a variety of meetings across the US where people who have the problem understand and are there to help. There is 1 meeting in Dalian China - a city of 6 million people and 1 English speaking meeting in Bucharest, Romania a city of 1.5 million. In Romania, drunks are locked up in jail and there is no insurance - rehabs are only for the rich and people fly out of country paying out of pocket. Really sad; we are lucky there are so many rehabs, online support groups, 12 step meetings, insurance and other resources here in the US.

[mcgsxr]

I went cold turkey.  But I don’t care how people do it. 

Agree with a dr visit as a good start.  And try different meetings to see if something clicks for you.

[mhconley]

How can I stop?

With help! I tried for years on my own but it was only when I broke down and asked for help that I was able to stop. I did a 28 day inpatient program and have attended AA and NA meetings ever since. I too had problems with the whole God thing until I learned God can be as simple as a Group Of Drunks. Today I do have a higher power I choose to call God. Just remember: Religion is for people who are afraid of going to hell; spirituality is for those that have been there and don’t want to go back. You’ve made the first step. Good luck to you.

Martin

[Peter J]

With help! I tried for years on my own but it was only when I broke down and asked for help that I was able to stop.

Ditto for me. As a result of my mother embarking on recovery path and her concern about familial  predisposition, I had been to all sorts of meetings and learned much about adiction. ACA, Al Anon, AA.

 Being the independant cuss that I am, I self-diagnosed and tried cold turkey, subliminal tapes and I don't remember what else. This led to  justification, denial and self loathing to boot.

 For me, it took a breakdown the likes of which I'd never had. A sobbing mess of a man, 35 years old and calling my parents for support and advice, which fortuately I knew I could count on. It was  a piviotal moment in my life. For the first time, I was honest with myself about myself. An honest to goodness epiphany. I, no shit, shopped recovery programs the next day and went into an outpatient program.

There's tears in my eyes as I write that. I see sobriety as my greatest accomplishment now, but that took some time. And I had to admit I couldn't do it alone. Sharing my burden was key, and I now open my bag of shit for almost anyone who wants a look.

[Escott1377]

I begin my journey tomorrow after many starts / stops.  I have a prescription for Antabuse, meetings daily, and a great counselor to back me.

I am 41, hold a mid level job, but never could surrender to alcohol.

As a person in sales, I always had to lead the charge but now I am done.

I will say that for the person who wants to get sober, the book Willpower is Not Enough is very powerful. 

I am looking forward to my journey and I praise all of you w/ so many years.

[Markwatkiss]

I feel sorry for people who don't drink,when they wake up in the morning that's the best they're going to feel all day.

[mcgsxr]

I can relate to being in sales and being around booze a lot.  I found once I made my own mind up, and was willing to hang out with folks who wanted to drink I was more comfortable with it.

Good luck with your journey. 

[murphy11]

Best Wishes Escott. I was going to say good luck but in my experience luck has nothing to do with getting or staying sober or clean.

[JCarney]

Escott, a lot of good advice here. I adopted a philosophy or whatever you would like to call it early in my sobriety. I have a take no prisoners approach to my sobriety. If my sobriety is threatened, I eliminate the threat immediately. Fortunately, there have only been a couple of times that I felt it was threatened. I just eliminated those things or people from my life. In AA, they say you need to get rid of old play places, play things, and play friends. When I got sober, there was maybe one or two alternatives to AA. Today, it appears there are several to choose from to fit an individuals needs, which is great. I too, was not into the whole god thing either. I even said in a meeting early in my sobriety that the god thing did not work for me. The guy that was running the meeting suggested that you could look at it as a group of drunks willing to help. I liked that. I hope you find what you need to rid yourself of the beast.

Sincerely,
JCarney

[Tyson]

I begin my journey tomorrow after many starts / stops.  I have a prescription for Antabuse, meetings daily, and a great counselor to back me.

I am 41, hold a mid level job, but never could surrender to alcohol.

As a person in sales, I always had to lead the charge but now I am done.

I will say that for the person who wants to get sober, the book Willpower is Not Enough is very powerful. 

I am looking forward to my journey and I praise all of you w/ so many years.

That's a really solid plan!  As a little side hack, I found that chocolate (especially dark chocolate) was an excellent tool to help quiet down some of the more intense cravings that hit during the first 6 months of sobriety.  You laugh, but it's true. 

[OzarkTom]

I feel sorry for people who don't drink,when they wake up in the morning that's the best they're going to feel all day.

But at least we wake up. I have had drinker friends that eventually did not.

[2bigears]

  gonna give that chocolate thing a go.  6 weeks in on a three month trial run for total dry-out.  Easy so far.  Just keep busy.  Coffee and green tea.  A cigar helps too.    There is something to this sobriety. The government wants us drunk or stoned or medicated so we all stay silent in our little boxes. Haha ,,oppps
     30 years is super good work.  Nicely done.   

[FullRangeMan]

No comments favorable to alcoholism are allowed, also no disputes here.Thanks

[Peter J]

I feel sorry for people who don't drink,when they wake up in the morning that's the best they're going to feel all day.

That's a crass thing to say, but I'll field it anyway. While it's true I don't experience the big swings emotionally, mentally and physically that I did when practicing my addictions, I wouldn't trade what I have now for any of it. That's not meant to sound high and mighty, just that I embrace where I am and have found a sober life can indeed be joyful.

My mental acuity and ability to critically think is certainly better. I suspect that is a derivative of lack of mental fuzziness and also that I like myself more so I'm more confident in decisions made. Emotionally I can process what's going on without being jaded by yesterday's baggage. I feel more deeply and can accurately define and communicate that.

In addition, I've found that I've transitioned from a non-morning person to one who gets up early and relishes the day in front of me. This in place of slogging through the day so I could get to the evening, self-medicate and have more "fun".

So yeah, I get up knowing  I have the real potential to be the best me and I find it comforting  that  it will continue through the day.


On another note, for those anywhere on the continuum of addiction recovery, I've taken up meditation again after many years of not wanting to take the time. 30 minutes in the morning, 20 in the afternoon. It has enhanced my sober life in several ways, the most obvious to many is I'm calmer and less volitile. Not flatlined, mind you, but getting closer to the serenity I seek. I'm learning to be a better me and I want that to continue till I move on to whatever is after this life.


FullRangeman, I think I get that this is painful for you in some way, but  perhaps a light moderator's touch would be prudent so as to offer a balanced view of a problem faced by scores of people.

[FullRangeMan]

Hi Peter, I concerned with members that had this prob in the past to that they keep in the right track reading this topic, so just postings of testimonials, statements of encouragement and positive comments in this thread.

Also no beverages pictures are allowed and as I said before no disputes in this topic.
Thanks all.

[guf]

Polite fielding of that comment and great description what its like to be sober and how "fun"changes. Yeah I' big on the neutral concept not always grasping for the good and pushing away the bad.

 I have been a meditator like the book suggests to sit quietly. I've done that for years with good results. Mostly because it would get me away from looking for something to buy on here or waisting time on the internet. Last year I started hitting the meditation hard core. Lots of mindfulness practicing from the likes of Jack Kornfield, Tara Brach, more recently Noah Levine. The guided stuff has been wonderful for me.
I just finished Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics and loved it. Happy i was turned on to Jeff Warren, another great teacher a little less woo woo.

Meditation for me has been a game changer on so many aspects of my life. Thanks for mentioning it.

[macrojack]

This thread is evolving into a support group. The subject matter is sensitive and the conversation has been polite, sincere and valuable. I have seen no need for policing. So, let's please not have any, unless and until it proves to be necessary. The moderation needs to be much more moderate. This is a family matter, so to speak. To me, that means family only.

Consistent with that comment, I want to mention something that I realized during the middle stages of my recovery. I was prone to blackouts. This means that the following morning I would have little or no recollection of what transpired during my inebriation. As a result I was confronted on many an occasion about what I had done while drunk. News to me but very disturbing news. It suggested that there was a Jekyll and Hyde aspect to my depravity and it made me very self-conscious whenever anyone approached me. Ultimately it made me cripplingly self-conscious and imposed scarring which, 38 years later, has never healed. Very damaging and potentially fatal to one's self-esteem. The then lowered self-esteem serves to perpetuate the self-avoidance, making it ever more difficult to confront the demons driving my decline. I believe that meditation brings us to see ourselves in all our fiery denial, defense and agony. It helps to expose our self delusion and lends clarity to the way forward. A sense of balance becomes possible, maybe for the first time since childhood. Once you are able to look at yourself, it becomes easier to accept yourself.

All this brings us to a wonderful convergence of our hobby and our nemesis. Tom Waits got drunk in Copenhagen, Denmark back in 1976 with a woman named Mathilde. This song was the result.   https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBc6l8ykMBE

We get too soon old and too late smart.

[FullRangeMan]

This thread is evolving into a support group. The subject matter is sensitive and the conversation has been polite, sincere and valuable. I have seen no need for policing. So, let's please not have any, unless and until it proves to be necessary. The moderation needs to be much more moderate. This is a family matter, so to speak. To me, that means family only.

This topic was in the Quarentine for cleaning and returned to this circle just in expectance to help people.