Todays Smile

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jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3320 on: 20 Nov 2020, 12:43 am »









jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3321 on: 20 Nov 2020, 04:19 pm »





jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3322 on: 20 Nov 2020, 04:37 pm »





jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3323 on: 21 Nov 2020, 03:07 pm »



jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3324 on: 21 Nov 2020, 03:44 pm »

jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3325 on: 21 Nov 2020, 05:17 pm »
Manga version


Spanish restoration


Diversity version


Nightmare version


2020 version

jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3326 on: 21 Nov 2020, 10:07 pm »
“Go to the Zoo," they said. "It’ll be fun," they said.

jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3327 on: 22 Nov 2020, 12:12 am »

jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3328 on: 22 Nov 2020, 03:16 pm »



veloceleste

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3329 on: 22 Nov 2020, 03:37 pm »



James Tanner

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3330 on: 22 Nov 2020, 06:01 pm »



mikeeastman

Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3331 on: 22 Nov 2020, 07:09 pm »

A group of 3rd, 4th, and 5th graders, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to the local racetrack, (Churchill Downs ) to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry (Bourbon), but mostly to see the horses.

 

When it was time to take the children to the bathroom, it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other. The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the mens room when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal.

 

Having no choice, she went inside, helped the boys with their pants, and began hoisting the little boys up one by one, holding on to their 'wee-wees' to direct the flow away from their clothes.

 

As she lifted one, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring, the teacher said, 'You must be in the 5th grade.'

 

'No, ma'am', he replied. 'I'm riding Silver Arrow in the seventh race, but I appreciate your help.

Spyman

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3332 on: 23 Nov 2020, 12:30 am »



James Tanner

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3333 on: 23 Nov 2020, 11:44 am »



Craig B

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3334 on: 23 Nov 2020, 02:24 pm »
This one is from the new (4th) season of "The Crown" on Netflix. They have Prince Charles telling it at a party. If anyone else here saw it, please forgive any inaccuracies in my retelling...

A Siberian hunter goes off into the woods, hoping to bag some game. Soon he's surprised by a giant bear, the largest he's ever seen. He raises his gun and shoots, uncertain if he killed the bear or not. When the smoke clears, he doesn't see the bear anywhere. Then he feels a tap on his shoulder. He turns to see the bear towering over him, and before he can react, the bear tells him he has a choice. The bear says, "I can kill you now, as you tried to do to me, or you can pull down your pants, bend over, and let me have my way with you." Not wanting to be killed, he chooses the latter.

After the bear is finished, the hunter goes back to town and buys a bigger gun, and returns to the woods to try again to kill the bear. Soon he spies him, raises his gun and shoots. Again, after the smoke clears, the bear has vanished. And again, he feels the tap on his shoulder. Turning around, he sees the bear, who says, "you know what to do."

Afterwards he rushes back into town to buy a bazooka, and returns to the woods, determined to end this bear. He sees him, raises the weapon and fires. Once more the smoke clears and the bear has vanished. And again he feels the familiar tap on his shoulder. He turns to see the bear, who says, "You're not really in this for the hunt, are you?"
« Last Edit: 23 Nov 2020, 07:26 pm by Craig B »

jcsperson

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3335 on: 23 Nov 2020, 05:10 pm »

Mag

Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3336 on: 24 Nov 2020, 04:53 am »



rodge827

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3337 on: 24 Nov 2020, 05:29 pm »



James Tanner

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Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3338 on: 24 Nov 2020, 06:09 pm »



cementhead

Re: Todays Smile
« Reply #3339 on: 24 Nov 2020, 09:30 pm »
Not a thing! :D