JLM,
I am quite impressed that you are taking the time and are committed to build an energy efficient house. I really admire people who follow their principles, even if it means not travelling on the easiest path.
I'm also a little envious that you are getting your energy efficient house from scratch. That way, you can do it right the first time. I just bought a house that was remodeled very recently, and the owner didn't know a damn thing about energy efficient design. All the classic mistakes were made, and now I have to clean up the mess (and spend more money doing it right). But at least the house is nice, and I will have fun wiring up my house with data loggers and temperature sensors so that as I make improvements, I can measure the actual impact. As an environmentalist, I am unusual in that I am always trying to find the solutions that are quantitatively significant without sacrificing convenience unless absolutely necessary. For example, an energy efficient dishwasher actually uses a lot less water than hand-washing, if you wait until the dishwasher is full before running it. I drive a biodiesel car because that technology is orders of magnitude cleaner than any other car technology currently available, yet it doesn't sacrifice convenience, car size, or speed.
Regarding your impending dream house, I have done a lot of research into energy efficient design that I would be happy to share with you. Feel free to contact me if you want. Two of the biggest elements to a great design, IMO, are passive solar and radiant floors. Here in Portland, we can get 60% of our heating/cooling/lighting energy for free from the sun with good passive solar design. This also has the benefit of distributing more natural light around the house interior. I highly encourage you to find a good passive solar designer as step #1 of your home design (I may be able to help you with a recommendation).
I am also a huge fan of radiant floor heating. My neighbor just built an addition with a concrete slab with radiant heating, and it is SOOO NICE inside. Even in the middle of winter, his whole house was just comfortable. The temperature is even and constant, as opposed to forced air which is hot/cold/hot/cold/etc... His system was also very energy efficient when we measured it. Radiant floors are the only way to go for new construction, and when combined with passive solar, your energy bills will be practically nil. I will be installing radiant heat in my house at some point.
Of course, a good energy efficient audio system would be appropriate in a house like that, which is something that I hope to make very easy for people
