Joke of the Day

jhm731 · « **Reply #2040 on:** 2 May 2017, 07:03 pm »

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhRe426KZE4

LesterSleepsIn · « **Reply #2041 on:** 2 May 2017, 11:04 pm »

Quote from: jhm731 on 2 May 2017, 07:03 pm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rhRe426KZE4

I think Steve told that joke correctly. Obviously if Mr. Klipsch naturally talked in a shouty way he'd voice a speaker in a similar manner.

jhm731 · « **Reply #2042 on:** 6 May 2017, 02:25 am »

jhm731 · « **Reply #2043 on:** 12 May 2017, 06:30 am »

Shakeydeal · « **Reply #2044 on:** 12 May 2017, 12:03 pm »

Quote from: jhm731 on 12 May 2017, 06:30 am

You are going to have to do better than this. I don't think this forum is comprised of a bunch of 30 year olds with perfect eyesight.

Shakey

ServerAdmin · « **Reply #2045 on:** 12 May 2017, 12:52 pm »

If images loaded show too small, just add "&size=huge" at the end of the URL in the BB code.

I.Greyhound Fan · « **Reply #2046 on:** 12 May 2017, 08:15 pm »

I heard this inappropriate joke on Jimmy Kimmel.

What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

About 40 pounds!

A comedian told this joke to his wife and his 5 year old son heard it and told it in front of his class. Needless to say, his teacher called home.

randytsuch · « **Reply #2047 on:** 12 May 2017, 09:16 pm »

Quote from: I.Greyhound Fan on 12 May 2017, 08:15 pm

I heard this inappropriate joke on Jimmy Kimmel.

What is the difference between a wife and a girlfriend?

About 40 pounds!

A comedian told this joke to his wife and his 5 year old son heard it and told it in front of his class. Needless to say, his teacher called home.

People need a sense of humor

I.Greyhound Fan · « **Reply #2048 on:** 12 May 2017, 10:08 pm »

Quote from: randytsuch on 12 May 2017, 09:16 pm

People need a sense of humor

I LMAO when I saw this on the JK show and so did JK.

Kenneth Patchen · « **Reply #2049 on:** 13 May 2017, 02:01 pm »

Well, it was a toss-up really, where to post this. Do I post this in IT Crowd or Personal Touch or Home Improvements or Health and Fitness or Spectator Sports or Enders Game?

Then, as I always do, I asked myself, "What would Bob in St.Louis do?". So Jokes and Humor it is!

I made a butt wiping machine - YouTube

https://youtu.be/NmemOdsMtcg

https://www.yahoo.com/tech/simone-giertz-built-butt-wiping-190500847.html

mikeeastman · « **Reply #2050 on:** 13 May 2017, 02:22 pm »

Bob in St. Louis · « **Reply #2051 on:** 13 May 2017, 05:06 pm »

Quote from: Kenneth Patchen on 13 May 2017, 02:01 pm

Well, it was a toss-up really, where to post this. Do I post this in IT Crowd or Personal Touch or Home Improvements or Health and Fitness or Spectator Sports or Enders Game?

Then, as I always do, I asked myself, "What would Bob in St.Louis do?". So Jokes and Humor it is!

I made a butt wiping machine - YouTube

https://youtu.be/NmemOdsMtcg

https://www.yahoo.com/tech/simone-giertz-built-butt-wiping-190500847.html

You Sir, did the rigth thing.

Fantastic video!

JerryM · « **Reply #2052 on:** 13 May 2017, 07:21 pm »

Quote from: Bob in St. Louis on 13 May 2017, 05:06 pm

You Sir, did the rigth thing.

And the 'right' thing, too...

Bob in St. Louis · « **Reply #2053 on:** 13 May 2017, 10:58 pm »

Quote from: JerryM on 13 May 2017, 07:21 pm

And the 'right' thing, too...

My brain types faster than my fingers do.

JerryM · « **Reply #2054 on:** 14 May 2017, 06:24 pm »

djbnh · « **Reply #2055 on:** 15 May 2017, 04:00 pm »

This morning on the way to work I wasn't really paying attention and I drove into the back of a car at some traffic lights. The driver got out and it turned out he was a dwarf.

He said, "I'm not happy."

I said, "Well, which one are you then?"

djbnh · « **Reply #2056 on:** 15 May 2017, 04:09 pm »

Cleavage is the only thing that you can look down on and approve of at the same time.

---

What's the origin of the word "Boob"?
The "B" is the aerial view, the "oo" is the front view, the "b" is the side view.

---

A woman suggests to her husband that she have surgery to make her breasts bigger. Her husband suggests she rub bathroom tissue between them instead.

"How will that make my breasts bigger?" asks the woman.

"I don't have a clue," replies her husband, "But it worked for your ass."

mikeeastman · « **Reply #2057 on:** 16 May 2017, 08:00 pm »

JerryM · « **Reply #2058 on:** 17 May 2017, 02:38 am »

The company hires a new man.

He's supposed to start work on Monday, but instead of showing up, he calls his boss; "I'm sick," he says. Boss excuses him.

Man shows up Tuesday morning and works throughout the week, greatly impressing everyone with his diligence and ability.

The next Monday, he once again calls his boss. "I'm sick," he says. Boss reluctantly excuses him, but notes that this is the second Monday in a row.

Again, the man shows up Tuesday morning and works throughout the week, even faster and better than the previous week.

The following Monday, he calls his boss again. "I'm sick." Boss excuses him, but decides to call the man to task on Tuesday.

Tuesday comes and as soon as the man shows up, the boss calls him into his office.

"What gives?" asks the boss. "I can see you're a hard worker, but you've only been here three weeks and you've called in sick every Monday."

Man says, "Well, my sister is in a bad marriage and I go over to console her every Monday morning before work. One thing leads to another and we end up making love all day long."

"Your sister!?!" says the boss. "That's disgusting!"

Man says, "I told you I was sick."

djbnh · « **Reply #2059 on:** 17 May 2017, 02:53 am »