Well, you seem motivated enough to do some serious listening and adjusting to set things up right. I am similar in my approach to audio,
but only since I retired and now have more time than money to spend. I have the same problem - too much bass in the back - as you, but
have come to the realization that my beloved Snell B-Type speakers have to go in order to improve my system further. The 'B's are 5-sided
floor-standers that have a 10" rear-mounted sub in each box centered about 3.5' above ground. They are capable of bass in the very low 20s
and create some pretty long waves. When the speakers are placed with little or no toe-in (recommended) the subs are aimed at a 45 deg. angle right at the
electronics behind them.
My solution is to buy different speakers and start over in the room and kick the TV set and its gear to whatever space may remain and prioritize the 2 channel
system on the best wall in the house, a 26' wall with only allowing placement far from side-walls and allowing speakers to be positioned up to 6 feet from any walls.
Unfortunately, the 'B's still are pumping bass directly at anything behind them.
This weekend I will be getting a used pair of Genesis 6.1 speakers that actually produce more bass than the 'B's, but it is generated horizontally from a pair of 12"
woofers that are near the floor. Unfortunately, I don't have the thousands of dollars needed to recable my system that would be required to locate the electronics
away from the back wall. Eventually, I may have to go that route, but I am first going to spend a good deal of time on proper set-up and adjustment to see if I get things
sounding good while using the equipment and cabling I have, but I think firing the woofers parallel to the gear racks on the back wall rather than directly at them
will not be so bad. Towards that end, I have been scouring the internet to find good reference material to help get started when the
new speakers arrive. The most promising information comes from a Genesis Technologies White Paper that analyzes every possible parameter of speaker positioning geometry
using downloadable hi-rez files that pinpoint exact sounds to listen for when making adjustments. Each of 10 sections uses a single piece of music containing the actual content
needed point out whether speakers may need some tweaking, and what you should hear when every thing is OK. I plan to work this paper to death before spending
another $10K on longer cables.
The URL for this page is:
http://www.genesisloudspeakers.com/whitepaper/Genesis_Loudspeaker_Setup_Procedure.pdf